Eileen Hightower, Metropolitan Orlandia
Citizens of our fair sky-city are familiar with the cautionary adage “Mind the Edge” which has become a general colloquialism for well-wishing, but it seems as though several Orlandians have forgotten the grave importance of this handy, but useful phrase in the last few months. According to a report released this week by the Orlandia Commission for Public Safety, there has been a marked increase in Edge-related incidents within the last six months, leading to four deaths and three hospitalizations. All of the incidents occurred in the Eastern portion of the island in locations which have presented no issues in the past.
Commissioner Henry Firwirth is lobbying for a special task force to investigate the nature of these incidents, and propose measures to decrease or even eliminate future occurrences. “We cannot allow such preventable accidents to continue unchecked,” says Firwirth, “we have a responsibility to the people of Orlandia to provide them with a safe environment in which to live, and I will do all I can to ensure that safety”.
Johann Winters of the Orlandia Atmospheric Research Coalition has been researching this issue independently and believes that the incidents may be caused by a shift in the wind patterns around the island. These wind patterns may be causing a predictable flow of air currents similar to the tides in the oceans of the Down-Below. These tides, depending on the time of day, as well as other conditions caused by temperature and altitude may be powerful enough to pull unsuspecting Orlandians over the Edge. Winters is currently seeking funding to verify this hypothesis, and if proven, will be the first research of its type in regards to Orlandia’s unique atmospheric challenges.
The Orlandia Sentinel will publish the Orlandia Commission for Public Safety’s report on the Edge Incidents in a Special Edition next week and any subsequent information provided by the task force should it be formed.
Citizens of our fair sky-city are familiar with the cautionary adage “Mind the Edge” which has become a general colloquialism for well-wishing, but it seems as though several Orlandians have forgotten the grave importance of this handy, but useful phrase in the last few months. According to a report released this week by the Orlandia Commission for Public Safety, there has been a marked increase in Edge-related incidents within the last six months, leading to four deaths and three hospitalizations. All of the incidents occurred in the Eastern portion of the island in locations which have presented no issues in the past.
Commissioner Henry Firwirth is lobbying for a special task force to investigate the nature of these incidents, and propose measures to decrease or even eliminate future occurrences. “We cannot allow such preventable accidents to continue unchecked,” says Firwirth, “we have a responsibility to the people of Orlandia to provide them with a safe environment in which to live, and I will do all I can to ensure that safety”.
Johann Winters of the Orlandia Atmospheric Research Coalition has been researching this issue independently and believes that the incidents may be caused by a shift in the wind patterns around the island. These wind patterns may be causing a predictable flow of air currents similar to the tides in the oceans of the Down-Below. These tides, depending on the time of day, as well as other conditions caused by temperature and altitude may be powerful enough to pull unsuspecting Orlandians over the Edge. Winters is currently seeking funding to verify this hypothesis, and if proven, will be the first research of its type in regards to Orlandia’s unique atmospheric challenges.
The Orlandia Sentinel will publish the Orlandia Commission for Public Safety’s report on the Edge Incidents in a Special Edition next week and any subsequent information provided by the task force should it be formed.
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